511 riddles in alphabetical order:

1. A hill full, a hole full; yet you cannot catch a bowl full. What is it?
2. A hole leading in, a hole leading out, we connect to a cavern that is slimy throughout. What are we?
3. A home of wood in a wooded place, but built not by hand. High above the earthen ground, it holds its pale blue gems. What is it?
4. A little house full of meat, without a door to go in and eat. What am I?
5. A man without eyes, saw plums on a tree. If he neither took plums, nor left plums, how can this be?
6. A mile from end to end, yet I’m as close to you as a friend. A precious commodity, freely given, seen on the dead and on the living. Found on the rich, poor, short or tall, but shared among children most of all. What am I?
7. A one-eyed warrior, army of one, enters the fray, then comes out, all done.
8. A patient complained of recurring dreams. First he was a teepee, then he was a wigwam. What was the psychiatrist’s reply?
9. A pilot called Control Tower. Pilot to tower. I am three hundred miles from land, six hundred feet over water and running out of fuel. Please instruct. What was the reply from Control?
10. A riddle, a riddle, as I suppose; a hundred eyes and never a nose! What am I?
11. A skin have I, more eyes than one. I can be very nice when I am done. What am I?
12. A smack on the face, that some folks like a lot; when hidden in letters, X marks the spot!
13. A warrior amongst the flowers, I bear a thrusting sword. I use it when e’er I must, to defend my golden hoard. What am I?
14. A wee, wee man in a red coat. Staff in my hand, stone in my throat. What am I?
15. A word I know, six letters it contains. Subtract just one, and twelve is what remains.
16. Alive without breath, as cold as death; never thirsty, ever drinking, all in mail, but never clinking. What am I?
17. Although I have feathers, I can’t fly alone; if I move to the eye, it’s because I was thrown.
18. Although I’m one thing, my two ends are disjoint; one’s meant for deleting, but that’s not the point.
19. Always old, sometimes new, never sad, sometimes blue. Never empty, sometimes full, never pushes, always pulls. What am I?
20. Angry and hungry are two words that end in <@145>GRY’. There are three words in the English language. What is the third word?
21. At night I come without being fetched. By day I am lost without being stolen. What am I?
22. Barren location, infertile and dry; my name means `to leave’, it’s not hard to see why.
23. Be it political or for councils, it has many heads; or simply wooden, it’s used for filing.
24. Black I am and much admired, men seek me, until they’re tired. When they find me, they break my head, and take from me my resting bed. What am I?
25. Brothers or sisters have I none, but that man’s father, is my father’s son. Who is that man?
26. Crooked as a rainbow, slick as a plate; ten thousand horses can’t pull it straight. What is it?
27. Cross an apple with a zipper and what do you get?
28. Double my number, I’m less than a score, half of my number is less than four. Add one to my double when bakers are near, and days of the week are still greater, I fear.
29. Each morning I appear to lie at your feet, All day I follow, though fast you may run, Yet I nearly perish In the midday sun.
30. Everyone has a photographic memory; why don’t some people use it?
31. Face with a tree, skin like the sea. A great beast I am, yet vermin scares me. What am I?
32. Feed me and I live, water me and I die. What am I?
33. Formed long ago, yet still made today, used while others sleep; what few would give away, nor any wish to keep. What is it?
34. Forward I am heavy, but backward I am not. What am I?
35. Golden treasures I contain, guarded by hundreds and thousands. Stored in a labyrinth where no man walks, yet men come often to seize my gold. By smoke I am overcome and plundered, then left to build my treasure anew. What am I?
36. Have you seen Quasimodo?
37. He’s a boastful, puffed-up fellow, wearing spurs; eyes gleaming yellow, as he proudly struts about, he’s in charge, there is no doubt. What is he?
38. High born, my touch is gentle, purest white is my lace; silence is my kingdom, green is the colour of my death. What am I?
39. How can you have a set of teeth inserted free?
40. How did Frankenstein’s monster eat his dinner?
41. How did the intruder get into the house?
42. How did the weather bureau know there had been an explosion in the Japanese car factory?
43. How do echidnas kiss?
44. How do little skeletons study for exams?
45. How do monsters like their eggs?
46. How do monsters like their shepherds pie?
47. How do monsters see into the future?
48. How do you get a giant into a frying pan?
49. How do you get puffed wheat?
50. How do you make a kangaroo stew?
51. How do you make seven an even number?
52. How do you spell an Indian House To Let in four letters?
53. How does a graveyard love story begin?
54. How does a hot dog speak?
55. How does a witch tell the time?
56. How far can a dog run into the forest?
57. How many chickens can you fit in an empty box?
58. How many ears does Daniel Boone have?
59. How much dirt is in a hole four feet deep and two feet wide?
60. I am a common English verb which becomes my past simply by rearranging my letters. What am I?
61. I am a green round house, inside a small white house. In the white house was a red house and living inside, are lots of black babies. What am I?
62. I am a little red house, with no windows, no doors, a chimney on top and a beautiful star in the middle. What am I?
63. I am a window, I am a lamp, I am clouded, I am shining, and I am coloured; set in white, I fill with water and overflow. I say much, but I have no words. What am I?
64. I am as light as a feather, yet no man can hold me for long. What am I?
65. I am hairy and round and don’t make a sound, I have eight flashing eyes, and eight long legs too; you may just yell, when I wave one at you. What am I?
66. I am made of metal or bone, many strong teeth I have bared, My bite cannot harm a single one And ladies delight from the touch I have shared. What am I?
67. I am not alive, but I grow; I don’t have lungs, but I need air; I don’t have a mouth, but water kills me. What am I?
68. I am sometimes solid – sometimes not. To keep you from harm is my aim, I run right around your home, but am always anchored to one spot. What am I?
69. I am sometimes strong and sometimes weak, but I am nobody’s fool. For there is no language I cannot speak, though I never went to school. What am I?
70. I am the heart that does not beat. If cut, I bleed without blood. I can fly, but have no wings. I can float, but have no fins. I can sing, but have no mouth. What am I?
71. I am the outstretched fingers that seize and hold the wind, wisdom flows from me in other hands; upon me are sweet dreams dreamt, my merest touch brings laughter. What am I?
72. I am the tool, for inspiring many. Buy me in the store, for little money, Don’t overuse me, or I’ll dry up and fail, what am I? Do you know?
73. I am two-faced, but bear only one, I have no legs, but travel widely. Men spill much blood over me, Kings leave their imprint on me. I have greatest power when given away, yet lust for me keeps me locked away. What am I?
74. I dance four feet to every line, with A and A, I try to rhyme. And B and B make couples two, the answer my friend, stands in front of you.
75. I fly through the air and come back to the ground, I get hit by hands, I’m hard and I’m round, Sometimes I’m patterned, sometimes smooth, My dimpled sides help you catch when I move. What am I?
76. I have a long tail and my coat is furry, It’s orange and black — when I run it looks blurry, all other creatures to escape me should strive, because I’m the fastest animal alive. What am I?
77. I have a look of awful scorn, I wear my clothes <@145>til they’re tattered and torn, Waving my arms over fields, forlorn, I keep birds away from early morn. What am I?
78. I have an eye, but I cannot see and I am guided only by the winds. I am strong and disasterous, but in the centre I am calm. What am I?
79. I have eyes that see forward and sideways, I eat food like cabbage and greens, When I get into mischief I gnaw at the cable of the TV, which sits on the kitchen table. What am I?
80. I have four wings, but cannot fly, I never laugh and never cry; On the same spot I’m always found, toiling away with little sound. What am I?
81. I have hands, but am not flesh or bone. What am I?
82. I have holes on my top and bottom, holes on my left and my right and I have holes in my middle, yet still I hold water. What am I?
83. I have joy in bringing two together, but darning my existence! My life hangs by a thread, filled with ups, downs and resistance!
84. I have legs, but walk not; a strong back, but work not; two good arms, but reach not; a seat, but sit and tarry not. What am I?
85. I have only two backbones, but many thousand ribs.
86. I know a thousand faces, and count the tailed heads, feasting bright upon the eyes, of many who are dead. wielding well a mighty power, who hath but humble stature. Masses fall upon their knees, to behold my only side!
87. I live in the rivers, but not in a bog, people often mistake me, they think I’m a log, I’m green, have two eyes, and very sharp teeth I’ve spikes on my back, my skin’s like chain mail, and just to scare you, I’ve a long swishing tail. What am I?
88. I live under the sea and go dot-dot-dot, dash-dash. What am I?
89. I look at you, you look at me, I raise my right, you raise your left. What am I?
90. I love to dance and twist and prance, I shake my tail, as away I sail, wingless I fly up into the sky. What am I ?
91. I love to swim in water and play with the others, I’m diamond-shaped, like my sisters and brothers, my colours are vibrant, when you see my scales, they glint in the daylight; especially the males. What am I?
92. I make you weak at the worst of all times. I keep you safe, I keep you fine. I make your hands sweat, and your heart grow cold, I visit the weak, but seldom the bold. What am I?
93. I may slow you down, but you’ll want me with you, since those who forget me, soon bid life adieu.
94. I move very slowly at an imperceptible rate, though I take my time, I am never late. I accompany life, and survive past demise, I am viewed with esteem in many women’s eyes. What am I?
95. I move without wings, between silken strings, I leave as you find, my substance behind. What am I?
96. I pass before the sun, yet I make no shadow. What am I?
97. I reach for the sky, but clutch to the ground; I stay and leave, but I am always around. What am I?
98. I recently heard the eskimo’s love song. What is it?
99. I run around the city, but I never move. What am I?
100. I run, yet I have no legs. What am I?
101. I saw a man in white, and he looked quite a sight. He was not old, but he stood in the cold. When he felt the sun, he started to run. Who could he be? Please answer me.
102. I sleep by day, I fly by night. I have no feathers to aid my flight.
103. I sleep by night and hunt by day, I’m black and sleek when catching my prey, I have strong teeth, sharp claws and run fast, I’m a danger to others, especially the last. What am I?
104. I touch your face, I’m in your words, I fill up space, And beloved of birds. What am I?
105. I travel far, but stay in a corner, and I’m certainly not, little Jack Horner. What am I?
106. I weaken all men for hours each day. I show you strange visions while you are away. I take you by night, by day take you back, none suffer to have me, but do from my lack. What am I?
107. I went to the woods and got it; sat me down to search for it; and I brought it home, because I couldn’t find it. What is it?
108. I’m a friendly large creature, that lives in the sea, my brothers and sisters all swim close to me, from a boat you will see me as, through the water I glide, when I come up to you, you may hitch a ride. What am I?
109. I’m a little pool with two layers of wall. One white and soft around, the other hard and brown. What am I?
110. I’m a moment in time, yet forever I last; no time I am coming, no time have I passed.
111. I’m a strong swimmer and live in the sea, some folks say I’m imaginary, I cannot walk as humans do, and I talk sea talk and make noises too, I can be a woman, but not a man, I live on fish, but not out of a can. What am I?
112. I’m born in the morning, and stay within sight, I grow in the evening, but die in the night.
113. I’m named after nothing, though I’m awfully clamorous. And when I’m not working, your house is less glamorous. What am I?
114. I’m red, brown, or different shades, I live in the rainforest with other primates, My strong arms swing me from tree to tree and my long tail helps to balance me. What am I?
115. I’m something you eat, you may know my name, or else my description, they’re one and the same.
116. I’m the source of all emotion, but I’m caged in a white prison. What am I?
117. I’m torn from the earth; in the market I am sold. He who buys me, cuts my tail, takes off my suit of silken gold, and weeps beside me.
118. I’ve got nothing to say, but I’ll put forth this claim; you’ll break me quite simply, by calling my name.
119. If a rooster laid a brown egg and a white egg, what kind of chicks would hatch?
120. If a wedding means showers for the bride, what does it mean for the groom?
121. If athletes get athlete’s foot, what do astronauts get?
122. If thirty birds were sitting on a perch; on the perch above them were thirty more, while on the perch above them were another thirty birds. How many birds would you own altogether?
123. If you have me, you want to share me. If you share me, you don’t have me. What am I?
124. If you look, you can’t see me. If you see me, you can see nothing else. I can make you walk, when you cannot. Sometimes I speak the truth, If I lie, I am nearer the truth. What am I?
125. In a marble hall as white as milk, Lined with skin as soft as silk, Within a fountain crystal clear, A golden apple, doth appear, No doors there are to this stronghold, Yet thieves break in to steal the gold. What am I?
126. In birth I spring forth, in life I unfold. with autumn’s cold I wilt and fall, but comes the spring sunshine, rebirth restores all. What am I?
127. In many hallways you would stand, without this object in your hand. What am I?
128. Iron roof, glass walls, burns and burns and never falls.
129. It could get lost, when you’re not well, and come back again, when? Who can tell.
130. It is in a rock but not in a stone, it is in marrow but not in a bone. It is in a bolster but not in a bed, it is not living, nor is it dead.
131. Light as a feather, there is nothing in it; yet the strongest man can’t hold it for more than a minute?
132. Little Nanny Etticoat, in a white petticoat,and a red nose; the longer she stands, the shorter she grows. What is she?
133. Little feet have I and tiny eyes, when ladies see me they show great surprise, my whiskers are tweaky, my tail’s long and cheeky, I move very fast, when a cat comes a’calling, If I stayed longer, this could be… quite appalling. What am I?
134. Long legs, crooked thighs, little head, and no eyes. What am I?
135. Long, slim and slender, dark as homemade thunder, keen eyes and peaked nose, scares the Devil wherever it goes. What is it?
136. Man walks over, man walks under, in times of war, he burns asunder. What is it?
137. Marking mortal privation, when firmly in place. An enduring summation, is inscribed in my face.
138. My face is pale and full and fair, and round it there are beauty spots. Indeed, by day I seem less bright, and when I’m seen sometimes at night. But when the sun has gone to bed, I then begin to show my head. What am I?
139. My first is foremost legally, my second circles outwardly. My third leads all in victory, my fourth twice ends a nominee. What am I?
140. My first is in chocolate, but is not in ham, my second’s in cake and also in jam, my third at tea-time is easily found, my whole is a friend, who’s often around. What am I?
141. My first is in elephant, but not in looking, My second’s not in look, but it is in cooking, My third is in talking, but not in people, I live on a farm, past the church with a steeple. What am I?
142. My first is in football but isn’t in shoot, my second’s in treasure but isn’t in loot. My fourth is in swallow and so is my third, my whole on a Sunday is far and wide heard.
143. My first is in ocean, but never in sea, my second’s in wasp, but never in bee. My third is in glider and also in flight, my whole is a creature that comes out at night.
144. My first is in window, but not in pane, my second’s in road, but not in lane, my third is in oval, but not in round, my fourth is in hearing, but not in sound, my whole is known as a sign of peace, and from noah’s ark won quick release.
145. My first is twice in apple, but not once in tart. My second’s in liver, but it’s not in heart. My third is in giant and also in ghost. Whole I am best when I am roast. What am I?
146. My first master has four legs, my second has two. My first I serve in life, my second I serve in death. Tough I am, yet soft beside, <@145>gainst ladies cheeks I oft reside. What am I?
147. My host thinks I’m an irritation, a bother, and a pain. But he cannot evict me, so here I will remain. Then one day I’m taken and ranked among my peers. Strung up with many others and worn round neck and ears. Can you guess what I am?
148. My life is often a volume of grief, your help is needed to turn a new leaf. Stiff is my spine and my body is pale, but I’m always ready to tell a great tale.
149. My maker never wants me, my buyer never uses me, my user never sees me. What am I?
150. My second is performed by my first, and, it’s thought, a thief, by the marks of my whole might be caught. What am I?
151. My size is unchanged; I thought so at least, but the more you use me, the more I decrease.
152. My skin is rough and scaly and I come in many hues, I’m about as fast as lightning, to lose my tail is frightening, but again, it soon renews. What am I?
153. My talons sink into my prey, like a hook into a hapless fish, my sharp beak can rip through a fish like a zip, and I glide the warm thermals whenever I wish. What am I?
154. My teeth are sharp, my back is straight, to cut things up it is my fate. What am I?
155. My thunder rolls beneath me, my lightning flares above. I dust the crust and when I bust, all I touch I will shove. What am I?
156. My voice is tender, my waist is slender and I’m often invited to play. Yet wherever I go, I must take my bow, or else, I have nothing to say. What am I?
157. Nearly bright as the sun, sometimes dark as space. Like a pearl on black velvet, with diamonds twinkling in a case. What am I?
158. No head has he, but he wears a hat. No feet has he, but he stands up straight. On him, perhaps a fairy sat, weaving a spell, one evening, late!
159. No sooner spoken than broken. What is it?
160. Not born, but from a Mother’s body drawn, I hang until half of me is gone. I sleep in a cave until I grow old, then I’m valued for my hardened gold. What am I?
161. Often I change, I’m a curious prize; what’s double my value, is half of my size.
162. Old Mother Twitchett had but one eye, and a very long tail which she let fly; and every time she went through a gap, a bit of her tail she left in a trap. What is she?
163. Pronounced as one letter, And written with three, Two letters there are, And two only in me. Im double, Im single, Im black, blue and grey, Im read from both ends, And the same either way.
164. Read my riddle, I pray. What God never sees, what the king seldom sees, and what we see, every day. What is it?
165. Rich men want it, wise men know it, the poor all need it, and kind men show it.
166. Riddle me, riddle me, riddle me ree, I saw a nut cracker up in a tree. What was it?
167. Riddle me, riddle me, what is that, over the head and under the hat?
168. Round as an apple, deep as a cup, and all the kings horses can’t fill it up. What is it?
169. Say, what’s in a mousetrap? What can be seen in a watch, in a bed, and a new trampoline? It’s there in your step and it quenches your thirst, and it always recurs, though it’s never rehearsed.
170. Scary claws and biting jaws, we lived long ago with the dinosaurs, we’ve a big strong tail and skin like mail and we’re still around today. What are we?
171. She had it in her pocket, but didn’t know it, then wandered to the shops where she discovered it, so she went back home again with to fix it. What was it?
172. Some will use me, while others will not, some have remembered, while others forgot. For profit or gain, I’m used expertly, I’m not picked off the ground or tossed into the sea. Only gained from patience and time, can you unravel my rhyme?
173. Sometimes I’m loud, and viewed with distaste. Poke out my eye, I’m on the front of your face.
174. Squeeze me and I cry tears as red as my flesh, but do be aware, my heart is made of stone.
175. Swirling, sparkling, shining bright. You can see it in the dead of night. What is it?
176. Take off my skin; I won’t cry, but you will! What am I?
177. Tear one off and scratch my head, what once was red, is black instead. What am I?
178. The Pope has it, but he doesn’t use it. Nuns do not need it. Your father has it and your mother uses it. Your lady friend’s husband has it and she uses it. What is it?
179. The cops were chasing a burglar down the road when he turned and ran into a cemetary. How far in did he run?
180. The more you have of it, the less you see. What do you think that I can be?
181. The more you take, the more you leave behind.
182. The one who makes it, sells it. The one who buys it, never uses it. The one that uses it, never knows. What is it?
183. The sun bakes them, the hand breaks them, the foot treads them, and the mouth tastes them. What are they?
184. There are five galahs sitting on a fence. If you shot one, how many would be left?
185. There is a thing that nothing is, and yet it has a name. It’s sometimes tall and sometimes short, joins our talks, joins our sport, and plays at every game. What is it?
186. There is one that has a head without an eye, And there’s one that has an eye without a head. You may find the answer if you try; And when all is said, Half the answer hangs on a thread.
187. There’s an ancient invention still used today, that allows people to see through walls. What is it?
188. They say that money talks. What does it say?
189. Thirty white horses on a red hill, first they champ, then they stamp, then they just stand still.
190. This thing all things devours, birds, beasts, trees, flowers; gnaws iron, bites steel; grinds hard stone to meal, slays kings, ruins towns, it even beats high mountains down. What is it?
191. This thing runs, but cannot walk, sometimes sings, but never talks. Lacks arms, has hands; lacks a head, but has a face. What is it?
192. Though liquid in nature, don’t push me too far; for then I will break, and the damage may scar. What am I?
193. Three blind mice lost their tails in a fight, when they saw what had happened they shivered in fright. Where did they go for help?
194. Three lives have I. Gentle enough to soothe the skin, light enough to caress the sky, hard enough to crack rocks. What am I?
195. Through the fence went 40 sheep, followed close by 40 more. The sheepdog did the silence break, <@145>til the farmer was awake, then through the fence the dog did creep, to help the farmer to reclaim his sheep. How many feet went through the fence?
196. Through wind and rain I always play, I roam the earth, yet here I stay; I crumble stones, fire cannot harm; Yet I’m soft – you can touch me with your arm. What am I?
197. Time flies like an arrow. What does fruit fly like?
198. Touching one, yet holding two, it is a one-link chain, binding those, who keep words true, until death breaks it in two.
199. Two bodies have I, though both joined in one; the longer I stand, the quicker I run. What am I?
200. Two brothers we are, great burdens we bear, all day we are bitterly pressed; Yet this I will say – we are full all the day, and empty when we go to rest. What are we?
201. Two legs on three legs, eating no legs, four legs runs away with no legs, so two legs throws three legs at four legs. Four legs runs back with no legs. What are they?
202. Unmoving horses, ever in motion. Bright lights, tiny suns, the sounds of commotion. What is it?
203. Used left or right, I get to travel, over cobblestone or gravel. Used up, I vie for sweet success, used down, I cause men great duress. What am I?
204. We are all around, yet to us you are half blind. Sunlight makes us invisible, and difficult to find. What are we?
205. We are nothing at all, yet are easily found; ignore them at your peril, you may end up crowned.
206. We are the sharp, slim blades, that cut the wind. What are we?
207. We hold tight the billowing sails of your ship, and can also keep track of the speed of your trip.
208. Weight in my belly, trees on my back, nails in my ribs, but feet I do lack. What am I?
209. What animal is a secret agent?
210. What animal is always happy?
211. What animal is white or grey, eats carrots and lots of greens each day, has a fluffy tail, long ears, long hind legs and big feet and has a cheeky smart comment whenever we meet.
212. What are Quantum Mechanics?
213. What are black holes?
214. What are laughing stock?
215. What are the odds on something happening at 12.50 pm?
216. What are tornados called in Belgium?
217. What bird can lift the most?
218. What can be heard and caught, but never seen?
219. What can bring back the dead, make us laugh make us cry, make us young; is born in an instant, yet lasts a lifetime?
220. What can fill a room, but takes up no space?
221. What can go up a chimney down, but cannot go down a chimney up?
222. What can run, but never walks, has a mouth, but never talks, has a bed, but never sleeps, has a head, but never weeps?
223. What can you break without hitting or dropping it?
224. What can you catch, but not throw?
225. What did Big Chief Running Water call his son?
226. What did Cinderella say when she mislaid her photographs?
227. What did Morse reply when asked to meet a friend for lunch at one o’clock?
228. What did the elephant say to the naked man?
229. What did the grape say when the elephant stood on it?
230. What did the little chair say to the big chair?
231. What did the mechanic do when he couldn’t repair the brakes?
232. What did the mother sardine say to her offspring, when they saw a submarine?
233. What did the pecan tree say to the monster?
234. What did the sign in the butcher’s window say?
235. What did the sign in the restaurant window say?
236. What did the sign on the funeral home say?
237. What did the sign on the hairdressing salon say?
238. What did the sign on the maternity shop say?
239. What did the sign on the muffler shop door say?
240. What did the sign on the music room say?
241. What did the sign on the taxidermist’s shop say?
242. What did the waiter say to the lady who complained there was no soup on the menu?
243. What did the waiter say to the man who complained his egg was bad?
244. What did the worm say to the caterpillar?
245. What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
246. What do baby pythons play with?
247. What do ducks watch on television?
248. What do elves do after school?
249. What do fish play on the piano?
250. What do you call a Chinese spy?
251. What do you call a boatload of students?
252. What do you call a camel with three humps?
253. What do you call a cat that’s eaten a duck?
254. What do you call a chocolate covered sheep?
255. What do you call a council worker with a shovel?
256. What do you call a council worker without a shovel?
257. What do you call a cow that doesn’t produce milk?
258. What do you call a dirty chicken which crosses the road twice?
259. What do you call a dog with no legs?
260. What do you call a neurotic octopus?
261. What do you call a sick crocodile?
262. What do you call a sleeping bull?
263. What do you call a smart duck?
264. What do you call a snake that works for the government?
265. What do you call a three legged donkey?
266. What do you call an Irish spider?
267. What do you call an ant that can add up numbers?
268. What do you call an eel that is out of water?
269. What do you call an elephant that flies?
270. What do you call musical insects?
271. What do you call the potato cook in a monastery?
272. What do you call three rabbits in a row, hopping backwards, simultaneously?
273. What do you do if you see a space man?
274. What do you do with a green monster?
275. What do you feed to a baby elf?
276. What do you find when it’s raining cats and dogs?
277. What do you get from a pampered cow?
278. What do you get if you cross a bee with a doorbell?
279. What do you get if you cross a mole and a canary?
280. What do you get if you cross a python with a saxophone?
281. What do you get when a cyclone passess over fresh water?
282. What do you get when you cross a Yeti with a Kangaroo?
283. What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawn mower?
284. What do you get when you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
285. What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with a lamb?
286. What do you get when you cross a pigeon with a general?
287. What do you get when you cross a snake with a magician?
288. What do you get when you cross a squirrel with a kangaroo?
289. What do you throw out, when you want to use it, but take in, when you don’t?
290. What do you use to hoe a row, slay a foe, and wring with woe?
291. What do you use when your credit card’s all maxed out?
292. What do young koalas do on the weekends?
293. What does a hangman read every day?
294. What does a witch ring for in a hotel?
295. What does it mean when the flag is half mast at the post office?
296. What does the Tasman Sea say when it meets the Pacific Ocean?
297. What does the sea say to the sand?
298. What dog has ticks?
299. What fish makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
300. What five letter English word does not change its pronunciation when four letters are taken away?
301. What flares up and does a lot of good, And when it dies, is just a piece of wood?
302. What four letters do you ask if your friend has just seen a ghost?
303. What game can two horses play?
304. What gets bigger, the more you take away from it?
305. What gets wetter the more it dries?
306. What goes 98, 99, clump?
307. What goes around an ashtray at 100km per hour?
308. What goes further the slower it goes?
309. What goes in dry, comes out wet and warms you up?
310. What goes through a door, but never goes in and never comes out?
311. What goes up and downstairs without moving?
312. What goes up when the rain comes down?
313. What goes with a train, and comes with a train, and the train doesn’t need it, but can’t go without it?
314. What grinds up rubbish and keeps you slim?
315. What happened to the butcher who accidentally backed into the meat grinder?
316. What happened to the guy who ran through the screen door?
317. What happened to the pregnant bedbug?
318. What happened when I poured Spot remover on my dog?
319. What happened when the lizard saw a brown snake?
320. What happened when the red ship and the blue ship collided?
321. What happened when two silkworms had a race?
322. What happens if you don’t pay your exorcist?
323. What happens to old Dairymen?
324. What happens to old bricklayers?
325. What happens when I’m not in my right mind?
326. What happens when you sleep on corduroy pillows?
327. What has a bottom right at the top?
328. What has a neck and no head, two arms and no hands?
329. What has eyes yet cannot see? (four answers)
330. What has feet and legs and nothing else?
331. What has four wheels and flies?
332. What has fur, four legs and flies?
333. What has more lives than a cat?
334. What has six legs, two heads, four ears, and two hands, but walks on four feet?
335. What is Beethoven doing in his coffin right now?
336. What is always coming, but never arrives?
337. What is an <@145>Ig?’
338. What is big and green and cries into its hankie?
339. What is big at the bottom, little at the top and has ears?
340. What is bought in a box at a supermarket, is soft to touch and sounds like a sneeze?
341. What is green and grey and goes round and round really fast?
342. What is green and jumps a metre every 5 seconds?
343. What is he that runs without a leg and carries his home on his back?
344. What is it that everyone gets, yet tries to get rid of as soon as they get it?
345. What is it that has four legs, one head and a foot?
346. What is it that is deaf, dumb and blind and always tells the truth?
347. What is it that rows quickly with four oars, but never comes out from under his own roof?
348. What is it that was given to you, belongs only to you, and yet your friends use it more than you do?
349. What is it that you must give before you can keep it?
350. What is light brown, hairy and has two humps and a trunk?
351. What is long and slim, works in light; has but one eye, and an awful bite?
352. What is long, sticky and brown?
353. What is neither fish, nor flesh, feathers, nor bone, But it still has fingers and thumbs of its own?
354. What is not alive but still is?
355. What is put on a table, cut, but never eaten?
356. What is the beginning of eternity, the end of time and space; the beginning of every end, and the end of every race?
357. What is the biggest ant?
358. What is the centre of gravity?
359. What is the difference between a Grandmother and a granary?
360. What is the difference between a big hill and a big pill?
361. What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?
362. What is the difference between a corpse and darned socks?
363. What is the difference between a dog and a member of greenpeace?
364. What is the difference between a school boy studying and a farmer watching his cattle?
365. What is the difference between a vampire with toothache and a stormy day?
366. What is the monster’s favourite ballet?
367. What is the only culture some people have?
368. What is the only substitute for good manners?
369. What is three feet long?
370. What is today’s mighty oak?
371. What is too much for one, enough for two, and nothing at all for three?
372. What is yellow, with greasy wings?
373. What keeps the outside out and your insides in?
374. What key does a burglar use to steal a car?
375. What kind of bush does a dingo sit under in a thunder storm?
376. What kind of driving schools should learner drivers avoid?
377. What kind of locks don’t need a key? Just use your head and I think you will see.
378. What kind of pet likes snack food?
379. What kind of rocks are on the bottom of the Parramatta River?
380. What kind of room has no windows or doors?
381. What kinds of clothes do kangaroos wear?
382. What lies in a bed, and stands in a bed? First white – then red. The plumper it gets, the sweeter it tastes and the better everyone likes it?
383. What lies on the bottom of the ocean and shoots people?
384. What lives in winter, dies in summer, and grows with it’s roots upwards?
385. What lives on its own substance, but dies, as soon as it devours itself?
386. What makes the letter T so important to a stick insect?
387. What name do you call a girl stretched across a tennis court?
388. What name do you call a girl who juggles cans of beer?
389. What name do you call a woman with only one leg?
390. What name do you give a blind dinosaur?
391. What name do you give to a boomerang that doesn’t work?
392. What object has keys that open no locks, space but no room, and you can enter but not go in?
393. What occurs once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in an hour.
394. What one word has the most letters in it?
395. What ship has no captain but two mates?
396. What sickness can you catch from Christmas decorations?
397. What song do you sing when you’re in the wrong lane?
398. What sort of day is it when your pet rabbit is grumpy?
399. What sort of shoes do frogs like?
400. What sort of tie does a pig wear?
401. What starts with <@145>T’ ends with <@145>T’ and has <@145>T’ in it?
402. What stays hot in the refrigerator
403. What stays where it is when it goes off?
404. What two words have the most letters?
405. What was the Energiser Bunny charged with when he was arrested by the police?
406. What were the batchelor’s last words?
407. What won’t break up if you throw it off Sydney Tower, but will break up if you place it in the ocean?
408. What’s 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus?
409. What’s a device for finding furniture in the dark
410. What’s a ghost’s favourite plant?
411. What’s a haunted wigwam called?
412. What’s a meteorologist’s favourite dance?
413. What’s a once used, never opened parachute with a small stain on it called?
414. What’s a twip?
415. What’s aperatif?
416. What’s better than the best thing and worse than the worst thing?
417. What’s dressed when it’s hot, but naked when it’s not?
418. What’s got four legs and an arm?
419. What’s green, four metres tall and mopes in the corner?
420. What’s green, runs through the woods and eats porridge?
421. What’s happening when you hear Woof! Splat! Meow! Splat?
422. What’s propaganda?
423. What’s red, flies and wobbles at the same time?
424. What’s the best way to get back on your feet?
425. What’s the carpet snake’s favourite dance?
426. What’s the difference between a flea-bitten dog and a bored visitor?
427. What’s the difference between a penniless man and a feather bed?
428. What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy?
429. What’s the fastest way to build a sand castle?
430. What’s the hardest thing about learning to ride a horse?
431. What’s the most popular red wine in the opposition party?
432. What’s the name of a vegetable and also something that no-one whispers and always denies?
433. What’s the worst that can happen to an egg in a monastery?
434. What’s white and green?
435. What’s worse than a crocodile with toothache?
436. What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
437. When I’m used, I’m useless, once offered, soon rejected. In desperation oft expressed, the intended not protected. What am I?
438. When do protesters remind you of creatures from outer space?
439. When does a pie go to a dance?
440. When is it bad luck to have a white cat cross your path?
441. When the Physics professor went on holidays what sign did he leave on his laboratory door?
442. When young, I am sweet in the midday sun. In my middle-aged years, I bring you joy, not tears. When old, my value is almost as gold. What am I?
443. Where can you find roads, without cars, forests, without trees and cities, without houses?
444. Where did Captain Cook stand when he first landed in Australia?
445. Where did Humpty Dumpty leave his hat?
446. Where did the abominable snowman keep his money?
447. Where do American pigs live?
448. Where do all the flowers come from?
449. Where do baby apes sleep?
450. Where do bees go to the toilet?
451. Where do bees wait for a ride?
452. Where do ghosts pick up their mail?
453. Where do mummies swim?
454. Where do you get virgin wool?
455. Where does Dracula park his car?
456. Where does a gorilla sit on a bus?
457. White and thin, red within, with a hard nail at the end. What is it?
458. White bird, featherless, flyin’ out o’ paradise, flyin’ over sea and land, dying in my hand. What is it?
459. Who invented fire?
460. Who was the father of all jokes?
461. Who was the straightest man in the Bible?
462. Why are cats smarter than dogs?
463. Why can’t a man living in Sydney be buried in Queensland?
464. Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
465. Why did Ned Kelly rob only the rich?
466. Why did the Indian wear a hat?
467. Why did the bubble gum cross the road?
468. Why did the carpenter sulk after some of his tools were stolen?
469. Why did the chicken cross the road?
470. Why did the cookie cry?
471. Why did the frog cross the road?
472. Why did the lady not want a window seat on the plane?
473. Why did the lion eat three ducks and a cow?
474. Why did the monster eat a box of candles?
475. Why did the monster go out with a prune?
476. Why did the moth nibble a hole in the carpet?
477. Why did the rabbit cross the road?
478. Why did the ram fall over the cliff?
479. Why did the red Indian put a bucket over his head?
480. Why did the slow mouse just get the cheese?
481. Why did the tornado bury cars in the ground?
482. Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
483. Why do cows wear bells?
484. Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
485. Why do kangaroo mothers hate the wet weather?
486. Why do lighthouse keepers raise chooks?
487. Why do mother koalas carry their babies on their backs?
488. Why do we dress baby girls in pink and baby boys in blue?
489. Why does Santa spend so much time in the garden?
490. Why does Sydney Tower stand in the middle of the city?
491. Why does a duck always look worried?
492. Why does a five foot man have a problem?
493. Why does a witch ride on a broom stick?
494. Why don’t tuna go past Townsville?
495. Why don’t you need training to be a garbage collector?
496. Why is a donkey with a high IQ always unpopular?
497. Why is a pencil like a riddle?
498. Why is a river rich?
499. Why is getting up at six in the morning like a pig’s tail?
500. Why is it hard for leopards to hide?
501. Why is the letter A like a flower?
502. Why was Count Dracula hanging around the computers?
503. Why was Willie Nelson in hospital?
504. Why were there screams coming from the kitchen?
505. With what do pigs write letters?
506. You can carry it everywhere you go, and it does not get heavy. What is it?
507. You can hear me, You can see what I do. But me, you cannot see. What am I?
508. You can’t see me, but I do exist, I help people to live, without me they would die, You can feel me as I travel around. I’m everywhere; you almost always have me. What am I?
509. You hear me calling to you, beckoning with my shrill voice; My keys will carry you to the place of your choice. What am I?
510. You may throw away the outside and cook the inside. Then you eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you eat?
511. You use it each day, tween your head and your toes, the more it works, the thinner it grows. What is it?

Get the answers from the book Riotous Riddles

Helen McKay